Chained

             It had been three years without any word. The friend's request on facebook had come out of the blue. It had puzzled her more than his disappearance. Mishti stared at the screen, unsure of what her response should be. Should she just ignore it and congratulate herself on successfully snubbing him? Should she just accept it and let him see what an awesome life she was living without him?

            It didn't matter to her that he had tried to reconnect. What good was it after all that had passed between them? She would just let him rot in some corner of her friend's list.
                                              
            No photos! Did he make a profile just to find her? There was  no other friend in his list, no photograph, no life events. Then it struck her. He had never been on social networking.

           No, she wouldn't start any conversation with him. She didn't need him anymore.

           An hour after accepting his request, she was back on his page. He had uploaded a photo. She opened it and saved it on her system, zoomed it and analysed it. He had not changed at all. A little paunch maybe but he hadn't grown fat. The background of the photo looked like a house. She wondered if it was his house.
                                         
           He went through her photographs. She looked even more beautiful than he remembered. She had lost a lot of weight. It appeared that she travelled a lot. He was amused to see that she had the the kind of job that required moving around. She had always seemed more content being home, having a stable routine, enjoying little things in life and the kind of girl who would effortlessly settle down in life. The girl he saw in pictures looked ready to take on the world, confident to go any place, hopping from one country to another, exploring the outside world and having fun. A lot had changed since he had seen her last.

        "Dadddy, see my nails" his two year old daughter Keya called him excitedly.
        He logged out and went to Keya's  room.
        His wife was applying nail polish to Keya's small toe nails.
        "See Daddy, I will look like Mumma."
        "It's not as good as your naturally pink nails Keya." He made a small face and Keya burst out laughing.
                                    
        When he found her alone, he confronted her. The nail polish had brought hateful memories.
        "Pia, I do not want you to expose Keya to any make up."
        "But Vishal, it looked pretty on her."
        "I do not want my daughter to become as vain as you are."

        She watched listlessly as he shut the door behind him.

        He opened the facebook account. She was online! His pulse raced as though she was near him. How he missed those moments when she would just sit with him and his whole body seemed electrified. He had never known that he was capable of such passion. His kind of people treat the matters of heart very carefully, not trusting anyone with their emotions, not even themselves. It was magical how she had awakened that thing called love in him. He had floated in those silky nights, whispering sweet nothings to her on phone, he had seen dreams that he once thought happened only in movies, he had found meaning in songs that were just mindless lyrics once. How he missed his heart beating wildly in anticipation of her kisses! How he had just thrown every thing away for the sake of honour.

       Would you even say anything? She wanted to shout at him. Why the hell did he even come on facebook if he didn't want to even explain why he had ditched her? Was he still the idiot who would never start the conversation fearing her temper? Why was she even bothering? What did she expect? What was to gain from a facebook chat that would leave her asking for more?
      No, she didn't want him to stir what had subsided long back, only to leave her all broken. That night she had refused to believe him when he had come to call off their engagement and she had sat on the stairs all night just hoping that he would come back. She had seen his car disappear, never to return.

      She put Keya to sleep and lay down beside her. Pia hadn't shared a bed with Vishal even once after Keya was conceived. When they had been wed, Vishal lived in a 2 bedroom but they had shared a room. He did not come close to her. He kept to his own. Soon they had shifted to a bigger house and Vishal had sent her home for her delivery. She thought he would forgive her after seeing Keya. Vishal doted on  his daughter but nothing had changed in their marriage. She had just married the father of her child.

     She was used to getting anything that she wanted. She was the only daughter and was pampered a lot by her parents. She had set her eyes on Vishal when she had seen him at a social function. Their parents were distant relatives. She had thought it would be a piece of cake to woo him. To her dismay, she had found that Vishal paid no attention to her advances. She had wondered if he was normal. How could a guy not be impressed with her? She put on the best of her clothes, did her make up with best of the products, she had a figure to envy, she had a number of admirers of her beauty. One day, she had been waiting for her friends outside a park when she had seen Vishal in the rearview of her car. He was with a girl who was nothing in comparison to her. The girl was a little chubby, dressed in pair of jeans and T-shirt and very ordinary looking. She had decided that day that she would get Vishal away from this girl.

    What was he doing? Why was he digging out the old memories? What had happened was his fault entirely. He had been too drunk at the Mehendi function of his cousin and that night had changed the course of his life.
    He was feeling tipsy and had been a fool to come out alone, finding his way to the room upstairs. The women were on other side of the hall, getting their hands designed with mehendi. He somehow climbed the stairs and was about to enter the room when she had dashed out suddenly, smearing her wet nail polish on his kurta. She had asked him to come inside so that she could wash it off. One thing had led to another and he ended up in bed with her. He had vague memory of that night. He had no memory in fact. He had woken up when it was still dark and found himself alone in bed. The music in the house was still on and he had a terrible headache. He went back to sleep again and next morning he was surrounded by cousins who were snoring blissfully by his side.

    All during the ceremony he avoided her. He did not want to accept what he had done. He had been ashamed of what had happened and wanted to forget that incident. Once the ceremonies were duly done and he had returned to his house, he  talked to his parents and they fixed his engagement date with Mishti's parents. He did not want to lose her.
    It had been a jolt when Pia broke the news that she was pregnant. What was he to do about it? He had panicked and asked her to abort it. He did not want a bastard! She had been adamant and gave him an ultimatum that either she will birth the baby or she will kill herself. He would be responsible for whatever action she took. He had been trapped!

     It was plain blackmail. He knew that Pia could easily abort the child. It wasn't even 3 weeks of pregnancy. He also knew Pia was not the kind of women whose life would revolve around their child. Bringing a child into the world was not her dream. She was just manipulating him. He hated her but it was equally true that he was responsible for it. Why should the child be a bastard? It was his child after all. What if she would commit suicide and name him responsible?
    With a heavy heart, he called off the engagement. He would never forget the look on Mishti's face. She had thought it was a joke at first and it had taken all his strength to not break down and tell her the truth. He had seen her sitting on the stairs in his rear view mirror and had let the tears flow down his eyes..
                                          

    Pia had no idea that Vishal would be so drunk. She had simply asked him to take off his kurta so she could scratch the nail polish off. He had been shy and handed it to her. She had closed the door. He sat on the bed, his gaze fixed on the carpet. She had touched him. He had pushed her away at first but she had pursued. She had claimed what she had wanted but all her joys had dashed when he had called her , "Mishti". She had wanted to avenge Mishti for the love that Vishal had for her!
    That was the only time she had him. He let her, thinking of her as Mishti. Since that day, he had never let her into his life. She had only been a mother to his child. She was frustrated with her life. This was not what she wanted. She wanted to travel the world, party, hop from one place to another, explore the world out there. Even though she loved Keya, she felt the responsibilities were a burden. Her parents too were not very supportive of her and Vishal was hardly the man she wanted for herself. Vishal would never love her. She could not steal him away from Mishti. She could not steal love nor could she force love. She was just chained to him.
                                                      
    She decided she did not want him back, even on facebook. She was happy being herself. She would find someone better. Whatever little hope that his request had aroused was not meant to be. IT would crumble down. Only, she didn't want to be waiting on stairs any more.. She clicked on "Unfriend".

    He had no right to go back into her life. He was destined to waste his life with Pia. He deleted his facebook profile and went to bed, another night cursing Pia.

   
      This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda.

      

This time your entry must contain the three words rear view mirror, nail polishand awesome.