Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Broken promises

               Today, as he sat holding Shreya's hand, he could feel nothing but remorse for their failed love. For the broken promises. A little more patience on Shreya's side could have changed their lives.
               Shreya was getting conscious and attempting to speak. She sensed Naksh's  hand in hers and a bleak smile came on her face. Her frailness was heartbreaking to see for Naksh.
                "Naksh.. I won't make it.. I know its my last."
                "Don't say that Shreya. Please don't." He tried to console her.
               "Naksh, I want to tell you something. I always loved you and I still do. If it weren't for my last wish to see you, I wouldn't have called you."
               "Shreya, why didn't you wait? You knew I loved you and I wanted to fulfil all the promises I made to you."
               "I was weak Naksh. I needed you. You always kept me away from you and your problems. I spent days waiting for you. And when I had someone who did all that I wanted you to do, I thought it was love. He showered me with attention. We spent so much time together. He took time to appreciate me. Did you notice Naksh, even once, that I had lost considerable weight in all those months you were busy?"
               Naksh remembered seeing her with another man. She had looked much more beautiful and lean than before. But the sight of her in another man's arms had made it impossible for him to stay there. He had just stormed away from there.
               "Don't Naksh. I know you didn't. You broke those small small promises you made to me. You hurt me and I still loved you. But when someone had time to love me, I thought it best to be with that man."
               "Then where is he now Shreya??" He raised his voice on her.
               "Left me.. like everyone who claims to love me." her voice broke.
               "I was just his muse. It was good when he was in my life. Maybe you don't know that he was a painter. It was beauty he was after. He was divorced too. When we were dating, his divorce was under way. Once he divorced I asked him about our future. He was a commitment phobic and his divorce had made him lose his belief in marriage. He still kept me happy though he started getting distant when I broached the topic of marriage."
               "It was a joke how I was getting the extremes in love. With you, I always knew that you would marry me someday but I didn't know if you would ever give me attention. With him I experienced happiness but not security."
              "He was shifting his base to Delhi. Meanwhile I too got a good offer in Delhi. He suggested we live in. It was a big decision for me to let go of my inhibitions but I still went ahead. I thought it might make him believe that we could be together happily in marriage. But this step of mine separated me from my parents. They disowned me. They haven't once spoken to me in all these years."
              "I was proved wrong. He was not the one to be settled with. With time he grew distant but you know what Naksh? It never hurt me the way it did when you grew distant. I realised then that maybe I never loved him. True love hurts. Like it hurt me to love you."
             "I m sorry Shreya. I cursed you all these years. Our relation could have been very different if both of us had taken some time to understand the other."
             "You had the right to curse me. I spoilt everything. For us and for my family."

She was getting short of breathe. As if it was going to be her last and that scared him. For all the sorrows they had gone through, they atleast deserved a day of love. Maybe it was time they both forgive each other.
           "Shreya, just let go of the past. It will only  hurt. I want you to forgive me." He had tears in his eyes when he said that.
           "Naksh I don't want to die thinking that you hated me."
           "I love you Shreya. I really do. After all that has passed, I still do."
And just like that, he stayed with her through the day. Talking about all the years spent apart. About the times they had spent together. He kept her spirits high.
He saw her drifting off to sleep again. This time with a smile on her face.
He knew what to do now. Things had cleared in his head. HE went back home to get that ring which he had still preserved. He dropped to her favorite restaurant in city and ordered her favorite food.

By the time he returned to her ward, she was already awake.
"I thought you won't come back." she said.
"I had to.. " he smiled.
He set the small hospital table with the food he had brought.
"The food smells like Kuku's!! I haven't had real food in months!!" she jumped with joy.
"I know.. But before that I want to give you something.."
He took her hand and slipped the ring which he had brought for her years back.
"Naksh this is beautiful" she said gleaming at it.
She looked at him with the same love which he was used to with her.
"Naksh please come closer. I want to hug you." He held her close with tenderness.
They had dinner in peace.

She sat resting her head on his shoulders. In perfect satisfaction. IT was time for her medicine and check up.  She dreaded it every time.
"Good Shreya, you are responding well to the latest drug." Doctor smiled at her, giving an understanding look to Naksh.
Naksh followed the doctor outside.
"Will she hold on more?" he asked.
"Response is much better but its difficult to say."
"But you said she is responding well."
"Response is only helping her cope with the pain. I m sorry."

When he returned to Shreya, he saw her crying on her mother's lap. Her father and her brothers had come to see her too. He felt it best to leave her to spend some time with them.
He went out to call his wife and tell her he will be stuck with some work.
Later that night nurse came to call him inside.
Shreya asked him to come and sit beside her.
"You called them?" she whispered. He nodded.
"Thank you" her voice almost inaudible. She held his hand and rested on the pillow.
Minutes later, her mother let out loud wails. Naksh felt her hand going numb and cold.. He had lost her...

P.S : sorry the story stretched long and took lot of time to be posted.


CD!!! said...

You know, just today I was going to ask about this story.

Most of the times, its too late by the time we realize the love we have for a person.
Beautiful narration :)

I do, I do. said...

The header of this blog is just so cool! :)

And your writing.. amazing :)

Chirag Joshi said...

nice story ya its long but i worth reading

I do, I do. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Blasphemous Aesthete said...

I remembered the story while reading it =)

It's beautiful.

Blasphemous Aesthete

Meety said...

Its beautiful :)