The Tamarind Tales

        

                                                   

        He looked at the red colored salted tamarinds laid out in the cart of the hawker.   He smiled in remembrance of the tangy childhood afternoons with her.  It had been years since he had last bought tamarinds for her.

                                             

        He thought of the afternoon they first saw the imli wala. Within a few days of his arrival, the imli wala was always crowded with school children. They were waiting for their bus when the imliwala offered them some tamarind fruit. She craved for the mouth watering tamarinds but they had no spare money to indulge. To make sure that they don’t eat any unhygienic outside food, their parents gave them money only enough for the fare for the bus.

       He bought her the tamarind for 1 rupee out of his 2 rupee bus fare.  They were just 7years old then. She was happy to have what she wanted but worried about going back home. He knew the way home and together they walked all the way home. Chattering, eating the tamarind and spitting the seed.  This became a weekly ritual.  Every week he would buy her tamarinds and then they would walk all the way home. 

They were friends and neighbors.  They called their weekly walk as the “Imli walk”. The imli walks made them best friends.

       He remembered how she worried about lying when they walked home late. He had suggested that they drop tamarind seeds all the way in the soil so that there would  be tamarind tree everywhere . and they won’t have to buy tamarinds They had actually dropped seeds on the side walks and poured water with their water bottles.  They checked on the sidewalks every week and felt dejected to see no plant there.

      When they were 10 she had once come crying to him and said, “I think I m going to have a baby.” 

      He had been surprised and curious and asked, “How do you know?”

     She had said, “Preeti says her mother is going to have a baby and so she keeps wanting tamarind. I too keep wanting tamarind so I also will have  a baby. How will I manage the baby and its shit? How will I go to school taking the baby?”

     “Don’t worry we will take care of it and we will have new toy to play plus we will get to play with the toys for the baby too!”

       They were so innocent and not known what they had been talking.

      They had grown up and grown apart but still been there for each other. 

       He packed the tamarind and took it home.  When he opened the pack for her, he saw the same childish grin on her face. It was the tangy childhood coming back. She placed one of them on the tip of her tongue and slowly sucked in its sour  taste.  She ate one after the other not realizing when to stop. She ate till her tongue  burned with the excess she had eaten.  She looked at him and they  both laughed.

   “Your baby  has had enough of tamarind for now. I bet it’s a girl!” she told him.

    He took out the sweet tamarind sweet which he always bought for her along with the tamarind. He knew             she liked to eat it after she was done with the sour ones.

   “You remembered?” she asked in surprise

                                       

   “I bet it’s the girl who wants to eat tamarind in the name of my baby.” HE winked at her

    “Then   your baby craves for Belgium chocolate icecream” she chuckled and pulled him close.

                                       

                                   

The perfect couple

              He stood at the corner of the hall with a drink in his hand. She was engaged in conversation with the women on the other end of the hall. Every now and then she looked at him and gave a knowing smile. His eyes didn't leave her all evening.
              She blushed at the greedy gaze he had fixed on her. A secret conversation was transpiring between them. He nodded in approval of her thoughts.
              Women in their social circle wondered what was the magic that bound them together. She was the object of envy. At twenty six she looked no more than eighteen. Slim and endowed with a figure that women craved and men lusted for. Gracious features and a childlike smile that adorned her fair complexion. No wonder she had the best man in town.
               He was the most sought after man and the kind women fantacise about  having an affair with. A muscular physique and facial features of a Greek God! His charm tantalized people. His deep eyes could intimidate anyone. A popular athlete in his college days and now a successful businessman. He was the kind who had world at his feet.
              Together they complimented in every way possible. They were the PERFECT COUPLE.
              She came to him and breathed in his scent. He held her close and whispered, "Hey gorgeous"
              "Care for a dance?" she asked him invitingly and without waiting for his response pulled him to the dance floor.
              She grooved to the music and he moved to her rhythm. Close, intoxicated, perfect.
              He recognized the chuckle she gave. Tonight was going to be the night..
              They were in their own world regardless of the people looking at them and talking of the way they behaved like teenage lovers.. unable to keep their hands off each other.. after 5 years of marriage!
                                            

               They could wait no longer. The desperation was getting too obvious. They left soon leaving the crowd applauding their dance.
                She ripped apart every part of his clothing as she revealed her cruel grin. Tonight was the night she would prey on him. He savored the pain she inflicted on him as she dug her nails into him.
                He was hungry for the orgasmic hurt she inflicted on him.
                She handcuffed him and brought out her whip as he gasped in anticipation of his defeat.
             
                They were the Perfect couple.. He- a pain seeker and she-a sadist..
                                          

A strange relation

                "Chris is he alright?" I find myself panicking.
                "Hey, I think you should meet him. He's been asking about you." Chris had a look of amazement and curiosity.
                 I entered the room to see him propped up against a pillow. He was visibly in a better shape but boredom was written on his face.
                "Hey.. how are you feeling?" I tried to open up a conversation.
                 If he felt anything, he did not express it. "Ok.." was all he answered.
                 It was getting awkward. He did not seem interested to talk and neither did he look into my eyes while talking. I was getting desperate to ask him my questions but probably this wasn't the right time. I retreated back and was almost near the door when he called out,
                "Don't you want to talk to me?"
                "Erm.. I thought you didn't want to."
                 He did not say anything. I was not sure if I was supposed to leave or ask him.
                "Do you get dreams?" I knew I would sound idiotic if it wasn't what I thought.
                 He looked at me in rapt attention as if ready to absorb every sound coming from my voicebox.
                 I knew I had hit on the nerve.
                 "What do you see?" I probed.
                 "You." he answered. Although I was expecting him to say it, I was not ready to acknowledge it.
                 "And?" I asked further.
                 "Why don't you take a seat?" he asked me. I sat near his bed on visitor's chair.

                "Why don't we start with you?" he asked.
                I dreaded the moment. IT was difficult to explain a dream when you have grown up over the years perfecting watching it. The early vague dreams which later started getting nightmarish.. The  nights I woke up crying and couldn't explain why I felt the pain... The fear of going to sleep for the next few nights.. How could I sum it up for the one who has been the cause of it all.. Or was he?
                 
                "The dream has been the same.. The frames keep changing.. I feel I m in a house.. I m on the terrace. Its an old villa but I feel at home. I sometimes feel a hand on my waist. I m filled with love. I walk down the stairs holding those hands which make me feel secure.. I walk a short distance outside the house and feel the grip on that hand loosening and then I have nothing...I m all alone.. It makes me void. Incomplete. I cannot think, I cannot speak. I feel trapped.. I suffocate."
                 The dream in itself wasn't so disturbing as the way I felt in those moments. I lived it! I look up at his face and I m touched to see the concern in his eyes. For years I have seen people brush it aside as a nightmare.. It felt strangely good to know that someone can experience the same pain..
               
                 "Have you seen anything like that?" I ask him.
                 "No.. My dreams aren't so clear.. What I do see is hurried images in front of me.. Sometimes I see you talking to me.. Sometimes I see us being close and I can feel that you are the only woman I belong to.. Sometimes I feel sheer pain at the memory.. I see you alone and I long to touch to you.. To comfort you but it breaks me to not be able to do that. I feel helpless.. My throat dries up as I try to call out to you.. I don't remember your name.. "  I feel an intense emotion building inside him.. He is much more disturbed than me.. Maybe because his dream lack clarity. He struggles to get hold of those visions but they move faster than he can understand them..
                  "Have you always seen me?" I know I m pushing him too much.
                  "No.. no.. I never saw you.. It was a blurred face and can you imagine how frustrating it was to me? The moment I saw you I found peace. Suddenly that face became you." he gave a weak smile..
                  " I never saw you.. I only felt you.. I could feel your arms, you hands but face... I couldn't see.. It was something vague.. I never understood why.. While the feelings and sensations were so clear, I couldn't hold you close or see you all I wanted to.. I had no idea until you asked about dreams yesterday.."
                    I sobbed. I didn't know what my grief was, just like in my dreams. Nevertheless I had a deep hurt that I needed to cry on. He did not make me feel weird. He held me close and comforted me. I sense that this gives him some kind of satisfaction. It lessens his grief, which he too is clueless about. I held on to him for sometime.
                    "Why did you come to my college and who are you?" I suddenly ask him. He laughs.
                    "Time for some formal introduction. I m Nabhanyu.. I was actually waiting for one of my contacts but seems like I was in the wrong place. He was giving me directions when destiny lead me to you.. I m from New York but shifted here for official purpose. What about you?"
                    " I m Naeema. I m from this very city.. " We kept talking for a long time and it now felt like we have known each other forever.. Maybe we did..
                    "I don't know if its love, but I cannot take my eyes off her." 
                    I blushed. Oh my God!! I hear his thoughts...
                    Nabhanyu- the eternal and Naeema was the blessed one..
                   

A strange relation

                     Read Part 2 and Part 1
                     I decided I would go to see him after my lab work was done. I took a bus to go to college. The hospital fell on my way. When the bus halted right in front of the hospital I couldn't hold myself. I got down and walked into the hospital, not knowing who I was there to see.
                     The smell of disinfectant stung me the moment I set my foot in. Being a government hospital the out patient department was swarming. A very busy receptionist gave me a bored look on asking her several times.
                     "Madam aap kisko dekhne aayi hai? Naam toh pata hoga na?" (Madam who have you come to visit. You must be knowing the name right?" )
                     "Nahi, kal shaam ko admit hue hai.. Please zara dekhiye na." ( No, he got admitted last evening. Please check.")
                      I was uncomfortable there. I had never been to a hospital alone and pleading someone this way was beyond my nature. Still with the help of a ward boy I managed to locate the ward he was in. I heard the receptionist mutter "Kaha kaha se aajate hai". It was embarrassing.
                      He was in a ward on the second floor. I heaved a sigh of relief when I saw  Chris. He was the general secretary of our college and a very warm fellow. The hospital suddenly didn't look that gloomy.
                      "Hey Naeema, what are you doing here?" He looked surprised to see me.
                      "Chris, that guy who had an accident in our college.. how is he?"
                      "He is out of danger but he will require to be admitted for few more days. Once he becomes concious we can contact his family. His coming to conciousness is critical in the coming hours."
                       Chris was sweet and caring. He had stayed behind in hospital for a stranger all night.
                      "Chris go home and get some rest. I will stay for sometime." I told him
                      "Are you sure? I mean don't you have any class right now?" he enquired
                      "It's alright. I can manage."
                      "No Naeema, I will go once he gets concious. Any emergency might come up. I better not leave you alone here." he reasoned and  I couldn't oppose it.
                       We went into his room. His leg was plastered and his head bandaged. Tubes were inserted into his hands. That was not how I had seen him..
                       I couldn't see him anymore. I rushed out of the room and waited outside. I saw a doctor and a nurse rushing into the ward. Soon Chris came out.
                      "Naeema, come inside." he pulled me in.
                      The doctor was busy checking his pulse and eyes.
                      "Chris, now I can say he is completely safe. I have given him an injection. Get these medicines from the pharmacy downstairs and I will come on a round in an hour."
                      Those deep eyes kept looking at me. His eyes wouldn't leave me. I moved around in the ward and then with Chris outside and I could still feel his eyes on me. The nurse was still in the room and she gave me a look that could easily be read as "What's in her that he is watching so intently?" 
                       Chris left to fetch the medicines and the nurse soon took to her heels. I was now alone with Him.. I was at loss of words. I couldn't move as his gaze was fixed on me.
                       He murmured something. I tried to inch closer to him. Maybe he needed something and was too weak. I leaned closer to him to listen.
                       " I knew you would come."
                       I was numb. My tongue felt heavy as I asked, "You.. you know me?"
                      " I didn't.. But when I saw you crying yesterday, I did."
                      "What does that mean?"
                      "Do you believe in dreams?" he asked in a serious tone.
                      "You get them too?" I asked in astonishment. My life was changing.. He tried to talk some more but he was too dizzy. Perhaps the injection was making him so.
                       I called out to the nurse in the adjacent ward. She confirmed it was indeed the injection that had put him to sleep. She further added that patients do talk delusional things after coming out from such a condition. She stared longer at me but this time it was a comforting one. She asked me to not get troubled over what the patient might talk and left the room.
                      Before I could analyse what had just occurred in the room, Chris came back. He advised me to go home. There was a lot of inquiry to be done in this matter and I shouldn't get involved. I thanked him again for all the caring and left for home.
                    His thoughts left me disturbed. Nothing was going to be the same any more.
                    Later that night Misha texted me, "r u crazy? Why did u miss 2day's lab?" 
                    I knew I couldn't explain it to her and left it without replying back.
                    Still late into the night I got another SMS..
                    I didn't want to see it but still I reluctantly checked it. It was from Chris.
                    Naeema get yourself asap tomorrow morning to the hospital. 
                    I jumped out of the bed. Was he fine? Did he say anything? I thought of calling Chris but decided otherwise.
                    Sleep didn't come to me that night. I wanted morning to come soon.. The next day would answer my questions..

(to be continued)
                

A strange relation

                 I found myself running to the lawn. No sound, that I heard, made any sense to me. I knew I had to somehow ensure his safety. That's all that I cared. I could see some guys helping him on to a stretcher. Luckily the stretcher was available as a preparation for  the intercollegiate sports meet which was to happen the next day. They had made him lie on the stretcher and were busy informing the authorities.
                 I pushed through the crowd and tried to reach closer to him. He had an athletic built and was fair skinned. His complexion had turned pink as he was writhing in pain. His leg was hurt and his head was injured too. I winced. I could not bear to see him hurt. I don't know why and what conspired in those few minutes when he looked at me and smiled. That was the impression I couldn't get out of my mind. His pain and smile at one and the same time!
                 The ambulance reached within some time and they took him to the hospital. The crowd had started to disperse when someone placed a hand on my shoulder. I turned to see Misha there. She looked tensed and as her hand approached me I realised that she was wiping my tears. I had been crying!
                 "Don't worry, he'll be fine. Let's go home' she said to me. I followed her.
                 "Do you know what happened?" she asked me. I shook my head in disapproval.
                 "You know that tree just at the corner of the lawn? The one that was shaking madly today? It sort of clicked and fell. That guy was standing close to it. He moved back suddenly and dashed with a car. Can you imagine it? Hit by a car while trying to escape an unpruned tree. Poor fellow. He was destined to be hurt today."
                 "Where have they taken him?" I asked her.
                 " The hospital close to our college.. Umm yea Sarvodaya hospital."
                 "You know what's strange? That guy didn't have a single id. They have no idea whom to contact. No one knows who he is. Added to it, the tree isn't really part of our college. Its on BMC road so its supposed to be their fault. It could go on forever you know. The lady driving the car panicked! I guess she will have to be admitted too, that's how much shaken she was. Anyway it will be dealt by them. We got free early atleast." she added.
                 The mystery surrounding the guy was deepening now. There was something about him that seemed to pull me towards him. His perfectly shaped face, his deep black eyes with a thick brow arching it, his lips that broke into that mysterious smile, everything seemed to haunt me. I realised that I was still visualising him. How could he affect me so much? How could he get so harmed in the few seconds my sight left him?
                  I reached home. For a brief time I settled into the normal routine. Soon I had forgotten my earlier confusions and fell  off to sleep.
                  It was then that it happened. The dream that had disturbed me for years. I sat up sweating. Misha's words vibrated in my mind, "He was destined to be hurt today."
                  Then it all started making a weird sense. I wanted to see him again but now I HAD to see him.

A strange relation..

                      It was a regular day at college. The lectures that day were all boring. Just for the sake of attendance we had brought our lazy selves into the classroom. The lecturer was changing slides faster than we could open our eyes. The moment she saw one of the students paying the least attention she would get into her routine of reading the slides and make us more sleepy!
                     The first benchers were scribbling notes. The second row students were busy reading novels below their desks.

                     Misha was busy drafting a letter (rather a love letter) to her prince charming who was happily dozing off. Misha had set eyes on Rounak on the very first day of college. She had spent the entire semester deliberating whether to confess her feelings of let him guess. Rounak was the last person who would ever guess the meaning of her subdued and suppressed emotions behind her playful jokes and thoughtful SMSes.

                     Our classroom opened out to a lawn and half the class was lost looking at the final year guys who sat on the wooden benches on the other side of the lawn. They had left early it seemed. The girls were busy blushing and giggling at those guys.
                      The boys in our class seemed in a low spirit that day. A whole hour had gone by but no had started dropping their stuffs. The obvious childish hints the boys gave when they could no longer bear the constant slide reading!

                      This was the overall picture of the classroom I was in, occupying a seat between Misha and Reema. Reema, I thought, must have had a fight with her boyfriend. She was silent throughout and had lunch with us without even once excusing herself to attend a phone call that day. Misha was still writing her letter and quickly covered the book so that I couldn't get a peek at it. The last time I read it, she thought it was funny, I thought it was great. She felt I said that just because I write better than her. There was no point in arguing and I didn't bother to intrude her privacy there after.
                      An hour and a half later I kept staring at my watch to show 4.30 so that I could make a dash and catch my 5:05 local. Travelling in local trains had become a way of life and life depended on what train you caught.

                     This was one of the days when I wonder," what am I doing in a room full of idiots?" My friends were busy in their own worlds, I was fed up of giggling girls. I wanted to run away. I was praying I could just move out of the class somehow.
                     I looked out at the law, green and fresh in the month of October. Though its usually warm this time of the month, there was a little chill in the air. It looked as if the trees were dancing. I was jealous of the final year students who were out at the lawn.
                     That was when I saw him. Something about him seemed so much known and so much mine.. I was sure I had never seen him before in campus. He looked older but could he be one of the research students? I had no idea. He was busy talking on the phone and I was waiting for him to just turn around and face me fully so that I could see his face clearly. Why was I interested in seeing his face? Another question I had no answer to.

                       The immediate response I would have given to such a situation was to disturb Misha and ask her if she had seen him and she would have temporarily forgotten her preoccupation with Rounak and be as excited as if I asked her about her boyfriend!
                       But something about that day was strange. I kept looking at him for a some more minutes. Whne I was about to reach out to Misha, one of the giggling girls screamed out, "Nooooooooooo... Oh my God!!! Save him"

                       The whole class was startled. The lecturer seemed to have woken up from her meditation. Misha and Reema had a look of shock. As I looked outside the window, I could hear more screams. I tried to concentrate on the lawn and wondered where the guy went.. Then I saw him drenched in blood on the lawn...
             

(to be continued)            

P.S: sorry for being MIA for so long. Just lost the inspiration to write fiction. Although the entire story would be in first person narrative its entirely fiction. This was something I wrote in first year. Just found this today and got inspired to complete this story.. I will try my best to post regularly.. 

The girl who knew no joy

               Perhaps writing a post about her would not cause any difference. You may not see her and feel for her the way I did. My thoughts are all jumbled and it is in this state of disturbance that I write this post.
             
               I got to know her two years back. It was a newly started website about my regional language. It was like a facebook with people speaking my language. Most of the members there were either middle aged, from my native or those settled abroad. It was in this crowd that I got acquainted with her.
               Trishna (name changed). Her image display was a sky with a crescent moon. Somehow we began pinging. Through our chats I got to know about her.
               She was a housewife. Her husband a hotelier. She was originally from Mangalore and came to Mumbai after marriage. She whiled away her time on the internet when she was alone at home. She was in her mid 20s.
               After a few days of casual his we began to chat more.
              One day she asked me, "Do you wear kurtis? Those beautiful ones that have now come in fashion?"
              I typed back, "Yes I do.. mostly I wear kurtis"
              "Oh I love them. There are such beautiful patterns. I just cant stop looking at them in the market!"
              " So you wear them too?"
              "I wish. My husband doesn't like it. He doesn't have a problem but my inlaws.. "
              "You should tell him then. Wearing a kurti should not be a problem at all!"
              "They are uneducated. My husband is also a college dropout. They are not modern."
              "Hmm.. what have you studied by the way?"
              " I have masters in nutrition. But what's the use? They won't let me work."
I did not have words to answer that. It is true that such situations still exist. I had no idea how a girl can live with such restrictions.
                 

 A few days later there was some random topic about love, on that website. She pinged me,
"So you are in love?"
I replied back,
"Have you ever fallen in love?"
"Yes, I had a boyfriend in college."
"Then what happened?"
"Nothing my parents arranged my marriage then I had to marry."
"What about your boyfriend?"
"What can I say in such cases. I  had to forget him."
"Do you love your husband now?"
"Not that the this child is in my womb, it has to be love right?"
"Ohhhhh !! you are pregnant?"
"Yes.. 6 months.."

We often chatted and she told me how the baby was doing in her womb. She talked of the child. She wanted a son. "Just like that" she said, but somewhere I knew she didn't want a daughter to ever face life this way.

When she was 7 months pregnant she left for her native place. She had my phone number. Promised to text me when the baby is delivered.
A few days after she left, she called me.
"Hi.. I m online.."
"Oh great, coming!"
She told me she was at her mother's home. Her "godh bharai" was over. She told me that her husband had gifted her gold jewellery which was cause of much jealousy and anger of her sister-in-law and mother-in-law.
I was infuriated. She was experiencing such joy and her in laws were being so insensitive!

She called me once more after that while she was going for check  up. Within 15 days her baby was born. A boy like she wanted. She asked someone to text me.

I started going to college. Spent less time online and she got busy with her baby maybe.
After months she called me one day. I was using a new mobile and her number wasn't saved in it. I didn't place her and asked, "Who's this?"
"Oh you forgot me !"
"Sorry my phone is new.."
"Trishna here!!"
She was sounding very happy. Unfortunately I was busy and I told her I would get back to her soon. But soon didn't happen that soon and she didn't have a fixed number to call on. She never came online as her in laws didn't have internet.

Last year a common friend of Trishna and me on that website (which had closed down) messaged me on Google.
"Did you get new of Trishna?"
"No..what  happened?"
"Her baby died."
"What??????? Nooooo!!!! How??" I was shocked.
"Her husband had lifted the baby but somehow he slipped. The husband lost control and baby got hit on head. Died on the way to hospital."
"This is so sad. How is Trishna?"
"Her distant relative is a friend of mine. She told me Trishna has gone mad. She is totally out of senses."

I remembered the beautiful dreams she had for her child. How she wanted to bring up her child in native till he grew up to go in school. Of the names she had asked me to suggest... All dead.

None of us had her number. She had shunned the world..

This week the same common friend messaged me.
"Do you know about Trishna?"
I was silently praying that she is fine and maybe having a baby again..
"No..Tell me."
"She's dead."
"How do you know?"
"Her relative... She died last month.."
"How?"
"She had cancer for last six months.. After her baby died she got detected with cancer.. She was bedridden."

I don't know what to think of it. How can life be so unjust to anyone? She knew no peace even in death. She died everyday after her child died. Suffered the pain, emotional and physical.

What had she asked out of life? Wearing kurtis and having her child?
Her love, education, dreams, child, freedom everything got snatched one by one.

Maybe her baby needed her..Even in heaven.